Today I celebrate the day my name changed… Today I celebrate my 9th Wedding Anniversary!
Your 9th anniversary is apparently Willow… I wish I’d known earlier as I would’ve asked hubby to buy me another willow tree figure, I only have one so far which my parents bought me for my birthday 4yrs ago! Although hubby and I have only been married 9yrs, we’ve been together 12 and we got engaged a few short weeks after we started dating!
The millennium started badly for me and I suffered from a severe case of depression, made worse by loneliness and debt problems. I felt ugly, fat and unloved. That no one would ever want or love me and that I would never be a mother and die a spinster, sitting alone on my unloved shelf! I’d never been in a serious relationship and I was painfully shy, both of which made everything worse. I was living alone but I wasn’t coping very well because of loneliness as I only had my dog for company and apart from work I wouldn’t leave the house and just sat on the computer! I ate loads of junk and fast food and even slept on the sofa, falling asleep watching video’s. Then my flat flooded and I had to move back in with my parents and they were shocked at the state I’d gotten myself into! The following year I was feeling better, but I was still feeling lonely and unloved.
One weekend, towards the end of May 2001, I was persuaded to go out with some work colleagues to celebrate a birthday. Usually I wouldn’t socialise, not because I didn’t want to or I didn’t like them, but because I was painfully shy. I was, and still am, a wallflower and you will usually find me standing on the sidelines and because I don’t feel comfortable in social situations, I usually try and avoid them. Yet for some reason I decided to go out for a few drinks. Hubby also worked at the same care home and he was out with us as well, but we didn’t speak at all that evening, we rarely talked at work and I’d never really looked at him twice and I don’t think he had at me either! At the end of the evening I caught the last bus home and he decided to catch it as well to go to the nightclub. He sat beside me and then started telling me how much he loved me, how he’d always loved me, and did I want to go to the club with him. Knowing he was drunk I said no, but that if he was serious about how he felt about me, he could ask me again the next time we had the same shift when he was sober!
A couple of days later I saw him at work and he apologised, saying it had just been the drink, and I thought no more about it. Then a friend came up to me and told me how he’d been chatting to her and that he was interested in me and did I want to meet him one evening after work. A few weeks after that we were together most of the time!
One evening we were chatting on the phone when he said he had something serious to ask me next time he saw me. Always quick to fear the worst I asked him if he was going to dump me! He said that wasn’t the case at all and he would tell me when he saw me, but I wouldn’t let the subject drop and, fearing the worse, I kept asking him. He refused to tell me, just saying it was something important. Finally I asked him, jokingly, if he was going to ask me to marry him, to which he repled “Yes! Will you?” Not the most romantic of proposals, but I said yes!
Knowing how traditional my father was, I explained to hubby that my dad would appreciate him asking his permission to marry me, and, at the beginning of August, he had the perfect opportunity as we went out for a meal to celebrate my dad’s birthday. Hubby was a nervous wreck, he barely ate and had a couple of strong drinks to settle his nerves! He finally gained enough courage and nervously asked my dad’s permission and to our relief he agreed, although he did tell hubby that if he ever hurt me, he would hang him up by his testicles!
In September he took me to Chester for a day out and to choose my engagement ring. Of course it didn’t turn out to be the romantic weekend away we’d originally planned. First of all he invited one of his nieces to come with us and then he let slip he wanted to be home to watch the football that night as England were playing Germany (England won 5-1). However, we still had a good day and the football score was the icing on the cake as far as hubby was concerned!
Even though we were now engaged, things didn’t go to plan! We moved in together, but then we both lost our jobs shortly afterwards and spent our first Christmas together skint and out of work! We always planned on getting married but life, and money, kept getting in the way and on our first anniversary of being engaged, we found out we were going to be parents!
Life quickly passed, our son was born in 2003 and then in 2004 I suffered a miscarriage and almost died! My great-uncle also passed away and left me some money, and having almost lost me, hubby wanted to use some of the money to get married! We already had a holiday booked for Blackpool for October that year, so we decided to make that our honeymoon and marry that weekend!
We married on a shoestring budget and I was 3 months pregnant! My parents bought me my dress, which was really a bridesmaids dress to save money and they also bought champagne at the reception. We booked the local registry office followed by a party at a nearby hotel and we invited our friends and family. Sadly none of our friends nor my eldest brother (who I’d hoped would take the pictures) could make it, but we still had a lovely day, with just family there. Although part of me still wishes we had eloped!
After the wedding we spent the night in the hotel whilst my parents took our son home for the night. The little guy had been the star of the show, amusing us all at the ceremony (and meant we all got a telling off from the registrar for not taking it seriously as we were all laughing at him) and dancing away the night! Once my parents decided to leave the party, at about 11pm that night, he was asleep before the car left the car park! The following day we picked up the boy and packed the car before heading to Blackpool where we stayed in a hotel before arriving at Martin Mere caravan park for the week!
We had a lovely time in Blackpool and we even had my parents turn up! Luckily hubby gets on really well with them and he even invited them to stay the night in our caravan! I can’t imagine many brides having their parents spend their honeymoon with them LOL
Now, 9 years later, we’re still together. I wish I could say it has been easy, but it hasn’t! There have been times I’ve wanted to throw in the towel, even murder him! And I’m sure he’d say the same about me! We’ve dealt with 5 pregnancies, one miscarriage, a court case when he lost his licence for drink driving, health problems, moving house, falling out with family, friends trying to split us up financial problems!!! But, despite it all, we’re still together, still fighting the good fight, and although life isn’t perfect, it certainly isn’t boring!!!
Here’s to the next 9 years… BRING IT ON!!!